Monday, June 23, 2008

Commiserating with myself

The beautiful Dr. Helen has spent some time discussing relationships. She has looked at married relationships, friendly relationships, parental/child relationships, and explored the dynamics involved. Of late she has been looking at men not getting married, or being interested in long term relationships.

I just spent most of today trying to find a song, that has spoken to me regarding relationships and intimacy of all kinds and shapes. I had remembered the voice as sounding like Billy Joel.

I finally contacted my lifetime friend in Denver who has a penchant for oldies n goodies. We played verbal volleyball for over two hours trying to come up with the song and the artist. After my broadband started cutting out on me, he emailed me with the words to the song.

It wasn't Billy Joel, it was Rod Stewart.

I have found in my life a desire for closeness that has only been temporarily broached in marriage.

I am a Christian, and readily admit that I beleive God created man to be in fellowship; in fellowship with Him and with each other.

Why is it, we want to be close to someone, yet, we let inconsequential things get in the way, and push us apart? It is no secret that in the 60s the Marine Corps trained us in hand-to-hand combat; including killing an enemy with your bare hands. My most recent wife, one day, heard me speaking with a friend of how I had been trained. She then informed me she was afraid of what I might do to our children if I ever tried to correct them.

She would get angry with me when I would play with the dog, because she was always afraid I would hurt the dog.

Yeah, I guess that does kinda go along with the modern day media portrayal of the male species.

But to get back to this song, check out the words to the chorus and see if they don't fit in your own heart and mind.

"And sometimes when we touch
The honesty's too much
And I have to close my eyes and hide
I wanna hold you til I die
Til we both break down and cry
I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides".

I guess, we are so afraid of breaking down and crying; or perhaps the fear inside of us is too scary to even think of bringing it to the surface around another person.

Well, every dog I have ever owned has never cowed away in fear, has always allowed me to cry and be a bumbling idiot.

Sometimes, when you cannot be heart to heart with another person, it is comforting to know man's best friend is always around to just be there.

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